Picture this: a client books a session. They don’t show up, but their boss does. Then their colleague shows up. Eventually, even their daughter gets involved. The one person who never actually attends the session? The client—the only one who can change.
What’s really going on here? This isn’t about scheduling issues. It’s about ego states.
Understanding ego states is foundational to doing great work as a hypnotist, therapist, or coach. It doesn’t matter if you’re using NLP, CBT, deep trance hypnosis, or just having a solid conversation—if you’re not working with the part of the person that has the problem, you're wasting your time.
Let’s explore how ego states operate, why they matter, and how to use them for rapid, lasting change.
What Are Ego States (And Why Do They Matter)?
Ego states are not abstract concepts or fluffy metaphors. They are real, neurologically distinct parts of the self, also called subpersonalities, that take turns becoming executive.
When an ego state is executive, it's the one currently in control of the person’s thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and decisions. It’s running the show.
This isn’t just theory. Modern neuroscience confirms that different networks in the brain light up depending on which ego state is active. These shifts are measurable. They’re tangible. And they happen all day, every day, for every human being.
The Internal Committee Running the Show
Think of the brain like a stage. The current executive ego state is the speaker at the podium, addressing the audience (aka, the world). Behind the curtain? A cast of other ego states waiting for their turn. Some are eager to speak. Others would rather hide backstage.
Most people have 5 to 15 ego states they use regularly (and 50 to 150 lurking in the background). These are the parts that run your workday, your relationships, your habits, your ambitions, and everything in between.
Our language reveals this naturally:
- “A part of me wants to start that business… but another part is terrified.”
- “He was in a horrible state when I saw him.”
- “Something came over me—I just snapped.”
That’s not a metaphor. That’s a real shift in ego states. If you're paying attention, your clients will tell you exactly which part you're talking to.
Why You Must Work With the Right Ego State
This is the golden rule: The part of the person that has the problem must be the one that you work with.
You could deliver a world-class protocol, masterfully structured and executed. But if you’re addressing the wrong ego state, your work won’t land.
It's like trying to help a client overcome fear of flying, but the part of them in charge of booking the flight is executive, not the part that panics during takeoff. You’re speaking to the wrong team member.
How to Activate the Right Ego State
So, how do you bring the correct ego state to the surface?
It’s simpler than you think. Here's what we teach in the Mike Mandel Hypnosis Academy:
- Ask about the problem in a way that invites emotional connection.
- Elicit the feeling: “How do you feel when that happens?”
- Anchor the experience in the body: “Where do you feel that in your body?”
- Name the emotion: Get them to assign a specific word to the emotion.
- Elicit the Subjective Units of Distress (SUDs): Rate it from 0 to 10.
This process lights up the relevant neural circuitry. The ego state that holds the issue becomes executive, and now it’s ready for change work.
When applying your intervention, always use the specific word your client assigned to the emotion. That word becomes an anchor that will keep the problem ego state executive.
Why Hypnosis and Deep Trance Are So Effective
One of the unique powers of hypnosis is its ability to directly access ego states—even ones that haven’t been active for years.
In a deep trance, clients may spontaneously shift ego states. You might notice voice changes, body language changes, and even age regression. They’re not acting. They’re not faking. These are authentic subpersonalities coming forward to be healed.
Some of these ego states are still children, frozen in time, carrying old trauma or outdated beliefs. When they speak in trance, it’s real. The client may not even realize how much of themselves has been stuck there.
At the end of a session like that, always frame the experience as normal and beneficial. Say something like: “That was pretty cool, wasn’t it?” This helps integrate the change and reinforces that what happened was exactly what was supposed to happen.
This Isn’t Just for Ego State Therapy
You don’t have to be doing formal “ego state therapy” to benefit from this understanding. Whether you’re using NLP techniques, cognitive-behavioral tools, or conversational change work, recognizing and working with the right ego state is what gets results.
No intervention works if it’s aimed at the wrong target. It’s like trying to fix a problem in someone’s life by coaching their boss instead. Unless the part of the person that holds the issue is executive, you're not solving the real problem.
Practical Takeaways for Hypnotists and Coaches
- Always identify the ego state that holds the problem.
- Activate it emotionally before delivering your intervention.
Normalize the experience post-session to aid integration.
The more accurately you identify and engage the correct ego state, the faster and more permanent the transformation will be. You’re no longer shooting in the dark—you’re speaking directly to the part of the person that’s ready to heal.
Here’s the bottom line: when a client shows up, make sure they show up. Not their boss. Not their logical mind trying to "understand the process." Not the perfectionist trying to perform. But the part of them that feels the problem, the one that hurts, the one that needs help. Because only that part can truly transform.
Ready to Master Hypnosis?
If you're serious about taking your hypnosis skills to the next level, you’re in the right place! At the Mike Mandel Hypnosis Academy, we don’t rely on scripts—we'll teach you the principles so you can truly master the art and science of hypnosis. Whether you’re a complete beginner or a seasoned pro, you’ll gain the tools and understanding needed to create powerful, flexible, and effective hypnosis sessions tailored to any situation.
As a member, you’ll also gain access to our exclusive 24-hour online practice rooms. These practice rooms are the heart of your learning experience—a safe, supportive space where you can apply the principles of hypnosis, experiment, and grow by practicing with fellow hypnotists from around the world.
Click here to join us and experience how the Mike Mandel Hypnosis Academy can revolutionize your hypnosis practice—and your entire life!
