Podcast #73: The secret to changing another person’s behaviour

Welcome to Episode 73 of Brain Software with Mike Mandel and Chris Thompson! This could be our last podcast before attending Hypnothoughts Live in Las Vegas this coming August, but hopefully we’ll record one more before then.

This podcast is all about how to change someone else’s behaviour. Check out the show notes below and scroll down to listen to the podcast directly on this page. Keep sending us topic suggestions and show feedback. We love hearing from all of you. Remember to send your Gus Grissom sightings to: gusgrissom@mailinator.com

Here are the show notes for this episode:

  • This is your last chance to sign up for our MINDSCAPING workshop in Las Vegas and get a discount to your Hypnothoughts Live ticket. We already have well over 50 people signed up and we prefer smaller groups, so we’re shutting down registration soon.
  • It’s all too common for people to want someone else to change … because we tend to think we’re perfect and we don’t need to change. The other person needs to change, right?
  • It’s important to remember that relationships are communication loops. The way to change someone else, magically, is to change yourself.
  • John Grinder taught Mike to ask the question, “What am I doing that is exquisitely maintaining that other person’s behaviour?” If you ask this question to yourself you’ll often come up with useful answers.
  • Chris asks Mike to do a detailed breakdown of the NLP personal edit known as “Theatre of the Mind”. It’s an absolutely brilliant technique that was taught to Mike by his mentor.
  • Don’t JUST listen to this. Learn it and then use it on yourself as a personal test.  Then use it with clients, friends, family, etc. Shock yourself at how incredibly powerful this is.
  • We discuss how formalizing this as a “personal edit” is more effective than just consciously analyzing the situation and thinking about how you *should* change.
  • Mike explains another great NLP technique that makes use of two chairs and an exploration of the three perceptual positions.
  • The three perceptual positions are: 1) Self; 2) Other person, or  empathy; 3) Dissociated, or observer.
  • Chris admits to using a horrible line on his wife that he KNOWS will irritate her, and relates it to the Theatre of the Mind personal edit that Mike taught in this episode.
  • Mike discusses the importance of having an exit strategy for conversations.
  • Chris brings up the “What’s next?” exit – this is the question all hypnotists should ask to their clients at the end of a session.
  • Mike talks about dealing with pain by speaking to it directly – it sounds like it should be totally nuts but it isn’t. Check it out as an exercise to use for yourself!
  • Want to setup your own personal anchor to fire off an incredibly resourceful state at anytime?  Mike explains how to begin the process such that you stack on more and more positive stuff each time you do it.  This is amazing stuff!  Anchors must be replicable, repeated, and unique so you’re not firing them by accident.
  • Mike is teaching the next Graphology Class in Toronto – September 17th and 18th – this date is coming up fast. Check out this video.
  • The Gus Grissom Update: Grissom was spotted in Jonesboro, Louisiana by a local deputy. We’re determined to find this man and speak with him. Make sure you email in any sightings to gusgrissom@mailinator.com
  • Empowering Question: Who is the single most toxic person in my life, who always manages to drag me down to their level, and what am I going to do about it today?

Metaphor: The cottage bear

Remember: Check out: MINDSCAPING training at Hypnothoughts Live in Las Vegas, in August 2016! Bonus: When you pick up a digital copy of MINDSCAPING using that link you can attend our one day class for free AND get a significant discount on your conference ticket.

Ending: Dave Ambrose, the People’s Physicist, discusses Robert Oppenheimer.

Please leave a rating in iTunes, and send in your questions by email to info(at)mikemandelhypnosis.com

Listen to the Podcast Here:

Transcript of Brain Software Podcast 73

Coming soon.