If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice. - RUSH
That one sentence speaks volumes. It quietly turns a mirror toward us and invites a deeper question. If I’m not choosing, who or what is choosing for me? Time? Fear? Habit? Convenience?
Most of us are taught to see indecision as a kind of pause. As though not acting gives us more room to figure things out. But in practice, not deciding is far from neutral. It has its own momentum. Its own gravity. Its own consequences.
Every time we delay a decision, we reinforce something. Sometimes it’s doubt. Sometimes it’s fear. Sometimes it’s the belief that our lives are shaped more by what happens to us than by what we choose to do. And over time, that becomes a subtle habit. A quiet drift. We stop steering, and we start waiting.
Tony Robbins often says that our destiny is shaped in moments of decision. Not in moments of perfect planning or endless analysis, but in those real, human moments when we stop hesitating and move. Even if we are scared. Even if we are uncertain. Even if we are unsure of the outcome.
And he’s right. Because deciding is not just about direction. It is about identity. Every choice is an act of self-definition. It tells your unconscious mind what kind of person you are. Are you someone who moves, even when it is uncomfortable? Or someone who waits, hoping that someday the fear will disappear?
What people often miss is that the energy we think we need in order to act almost always shows up after the decision. Not before. The mental fog, the confusion, the second-guessing; those are all symptoms of sitting too long at the edge of a choice. Once you commit, the fog begins to clear. The energy starts to return. The doubts may still be there, but they no longer run the show.
There is a reason the word decide comes from the Latin decidere, meaning to cut off. Real decision is not passive. It is not leaning in one direction while keeping your options open. It is the active removal of distractions. The conscious closing of other doors. And that takes clarity. Not perfect certainty, but clarity about what matters most.
I once worked with a woman who had been circling a decision for more than four years. She had built a career that looked good on paper, but no longer felt meaningful. A creative project had been pulling at her for years, but she kept waiting. She told herself she was being responsible. That she was protecting her stability. That she needed more confidence before she made a leap.
But in our conversations, it became clear that she was not waiting for clarity. She already had it. She was waiting for permission. And the only person who could give it to her was herself.
When she finally said yes to that deeper part of herself and took action, things did not instantly become easy. But they became real. And from that realness came energy, support, and movement. She began to feel like herself again. Not because the path was perfect, but because she was finally walking it with both feet.
This is what decisions do. They restore alignment. They reawaken something inside you. They stop the quiet erosion of your confidence that comes from delay and indecision.
When we sit in a place of not choosing for too long, we pay a price. Sometimes it is subtle. Our days feel heavier. Our focus begins to blur. Our sense of direction gets duller. We start doubting not just the decision itself, but our own ability to choose. That, more than anything, can slowly erode your sense of agency.
And it is usually not about the decision itself. It is about the fear around what it might require. The unknown. The potential loss. The disruption of what has become familiar. But fear is not a signal to stop. It is a sign that something matters. That something is alive in you, calling your attention.
So here is my invitation to you this week.
Take a look around your inner world. Find the place where a decision is lingering. Not the surface-level one that you can easily solve. The one that’s been living quietly just beneath the surface. The one you revisit in the early hours of the morning or the moments between distractions.
Ask yourself, what would I choose if I trusted myself just a little more? What would I choose if I knew I could handle what came next? What have I already decided deep down, but not yet acted on?
You don’t need to do everything. You don’t need to solve your entire life in one step. You just need to name the truth, and take the first honest action in its direction.
Sometimes that is sending the email.
Sometimes that is making the call.
Sometimes that is admitting that a chapter has come to a close.
Sometimes that is standing up and saying, this matters to me.
And then, watch how things begin to shift.
Because they will.
Once you decide, something inside you starts to reorganize around that clarity. Your time. Your attention. Your relationships. Your energy. It all begins to move in the direction of your choice.
That is the quiet power of a decision.
Not a grand gesture. Not a dramatic change.
But a simple, honest moment of alignment.
You get to choose what happens next.
And that is no small thing.
- Mike Mandel
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